Friday, February 14, 2020
A love story
I like to clown around dangerously with vanity. I like to dance with it. It is a recurring motif in clerkmanifesto to talk about how incredibly brilliant clerkmanifesto actually is. I say:
Clerkmanifesto is so brilliant that it is nearly impossible to see it. But one day they will invent glasses dark enough to let people see the shape of clerkmanifesto at its starlight core. And when they do people will put on those miracle glasses and they'll say:
"Hey, I can't see anything at all!"
Because they're still working on those glasses, even in my dreams.
It's a delicate balance, between the light and the dark.
There is something I have never gotten from clerkmanifesto in the world. And so I rail into the empty wind that comes back at me. I laugh and mock that wind. I rage in fury at it, and I turn my back on it. And in flashes I hate the world.
There are things I have never won and will never win. And though it's always less and less, every once in awhile I get mad about it.
But in other areas of life I have also won. And because I have won I know what it's like. It's better than but also so different than that which the other part of me can understand.
And so on February 14 I am humbled.
I am nothing special.
I have the whole world.
And I am happy.