Friday, June 28, 2019
I watched the Democratic debates. And because the odds are that you didn't, a choice I can't much fault, I am here to tell you who won!
This is super important in Presidential Debates because most people, including me, usually catch only a bit of the debate, or none of it at all, but might hear a snatch of news. So they, or we, mostly walk away with some kind of media consensus winner. One might even say that for the vast majority of us the whole candidate of our choice is not put together from long, disciplined study, but rather from little bits of cobbled together scraps. Too often it's made out of the scraps of other people's opinions.
But not so at least with these debates. I have the authoritative winner for you right here. I watched them for us all. This is the objective stuff, the real deal.
The winner was:
Whoever you wanted it to be.
I'll back you up on that. Unless it's Biden. Fuck Biden.