Wednesday, August 28, 2019

Bedbugs at library

Everyone just remain calm.

It was a minor issue and there are no indications that there were any actual bedbugs at the library.

I believe it's all taken care of.

And not to toot my own horn or anything, but I think I handled it pretty well. I was cool in a crisis, as one says, and I think I made some valuable contributions to the resolution of the problem.

We don't really have a protocol, exactly, for this situation, but I was able to contribute, I think, to a plan of action.

So I think we're going to be okay. God willing. Not that there's the kind of a god that wills stuff, but, you know what I mean.

I wasn't even there for the start of it.

Apparently a man came in and said he had bedbugs in his house. And by the way, here are our three library books back.

My colleague took care of these books, or "nests" as I like to think of them. She got them into a paper bag and clamped it up with gigantic binder clips. She washed her hands. She was sitting with the bag of books on the table next to her when I came in to start my day.

"A man returned these books." She said to me. "He had bedbugs in his house and thought we should know. What do you think we should do?" She asked.

"Throw them away!" I screamed in terror, backing away.

"Yeah, I thought so." She said. "I just wondered if we should..."

"Throw them away! In the dumpster!" I yelled. "Don't do anything to them! Throw them away! Throw them away!" And then I took a few steps further back.

Then she said something about how, yeah, she was going to go throw them away in the dumpster now, but I didn't hear it too clearly because I was standing so far away from her.

Then she went and threw them away while I went and washed for awhile.

Now I feel kind of itchy.


  1. Now I'm wondering how many patrons have bedbugs at home and return their books WITHOUT mentioning the bugs?

    1. I don't want to think about it! I don't want to think about it! I don't want to think about it! II don't want to think about it! don't want to think about it! I don't want to think about it!


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