Friday, January 24, 2020
Between two midnights
As you know, I write here on clerkmanifesto every day. This doesn't mean I write one post during every calendar day, precisely between the two midnights, it just means that come 8:30 in the morning I have one of my brief essays available to be set free into the howling wilds of Internetland. I may on occasion write four different posts all on a Monday and then have them play out over the course of the rest of the week. Or often, in preparation for International vacations, I have been known to write dozens of essays all in a few desperate hours.
I write when I'm happy and I write when I'm sad. I write when I have something funny to say, and I write when I'm feeling very bitter, sometimes both at the same time. I write when I am just dying for the World to listen to me, and I write when I'm kind of happy just to be saying it all to myself. I write when I want to simplify beauty and when I want to puzzle out the small tragedies in my life. I write when I'm hungry, or at work, or can't sleep, or need to get back to myself. I write for free, and I write like it's some kind of job that I've given myself. I write for fun and I write to save the world. I write like I'm falling down a hill. I write because god told me to and because god told me not to.
I write an essay every day. I've been doing it for six or seven years now. I write when I have so many things to say that I have to just pick one or two. And I write when the deadline for next morning is coming up very soon and I can't think of a single thing to talk about.
But something always comes to me.