Monday, August 24, 2020

Hand Sanitizer

Who would've thought we'd get a full half year into this Pandemic before we sat down and had a serious discussion about hand sanitizer?

I heard hand sanitizer is just a stopgap until you can do a proper handwashing. What happens with hand sanitizer is you throw a cocktail party in your hands for the virus until they get so drunk they all pass out. This is okay for awhile, but only until they groggily wake up in your hands, look blearily around, and then try to work out how to kill you.

It's just their way.

Oh, disclaimer. This isn't science.

At my library we have three kinds of hand sanitizer.

1. A weird paste-like substance provided early on by the county in a pipe stand dispenser that no right-minded person has ever used a second time. Ever.

2. The nice Purell Gel that is the last of our pre Covid cache from a large order in January or February. We lack the pull to ever get anymore of this stuff. Ever.

3. A mysterious, watery liquid that has been put into our Purell bottles and runs all over everything when one squirts it out.

This third, our main hand sanitizer, is not as bad as it sounds. I like to clean things by heavily saturating paper towels in it. I find its smell agreeably boozy.

And so, in conclusion:

1. Wash your hands anyway, as soon as you can.

2. If still unclear on any of this well researched scientific examination of all things related to hand sanitizer (Disclaimer: this isn't science), simply reread. Or, skip to...

3. You must be doing something right. You have not died of Coronavirus!

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