I was out at the front desk of my library with a desk partner who was taking the lead on training a new employee. I was mostly shelving requested books and listening to Bruce Springsteen read his autobiography, but now I was all caught up on shelving and waiting for new request books to appear.
Appear they did! Dan came out with two oddly arranged carts.
"I could put these all crowded on one cart instead." Dan said, not meaning it.
"No this is fine." I replied. "As long as they're the first half of the alphabet on one cart, and the second half on the other, as opposed to two complete run throughs of the alphabet." I knew full well they were the latter. Then I said a few more absurd things to Dan and suddenly realized that our new trainee was soaking this all in.
So I turned to the trainee and said "Just so you know, I would never talk to a co-worker or a library patron like this. Dan is a very special case."
The trainee wondered about this so I endeavored to explain:
"Dan is on the axis between the most irritating person you can imagine and a dearly beloved stuffed animal."