Among the increasingly frequent incursions of our County Management takeover of our library system, there is a great deal of new pseudo corporate terminology, Nineteen eighty-four terminology, Professional Management Class terminology.
In short, managers around here now are officially to be called "People Leaders".
This brings me to a famous old Twilight Zone episode called "To Serve Man". In this show large, technologically advanced aliens arrive in their spaceships, on Earth. They say that they are here to provide humanitarian aid and to help people. They can end famine, produce super cheap electricity, and stop war.
Wary of these uninvited visitors, faith in them improves among people as their promises begin to come true. Also, a cryptography team finally decodes the aliens' special book and understands the title is "To Serve Man", and everyone starts to trust the aliens.
Soon people are lining up to go visit the aliens' planet, which is supposed to be a paradise that offers even more wonders. The head of the cryptography department is going off to their planet too, but just as he's getting on the ship, the codebreakers finally fully crack the alien language. One of them runs to the Cryptography head as he is getting on the alien ship and yells to him: "Don't get on that ship! The rest of the book, "To Serve Man", It's a cookbook!"
And so when one of my colleagues next heads downtown to meet with the County People Leaders I imagine a similar scenario. As they climb into the car to be whisked off to the glorious County Offices I too will crack the code at the last minute. I will run out of the library to the back parking lot and, just as my colleague is getting in the car I will yell: "Don't get in that car. Don't go downtown! It's not "People Leaders. It's "People Eaters!!!!"