Speeding

 

I believe there is a psychology to drivers, me included, that is different than normal human psychology. Like, people's brains work differently when travelling on roads over 30 mph. I'm quite eager to theorize on the meaning of individual's actions in so many situations, but when it comes to driving and drivers I come up with insane theories, probably because I myself am driving at the time. And in the cold light of reflection these theories make no sense, but neither does any other explanation.

I mostly commute on four-lane highways, so here is a classic example I regularly run into, in some variation, so often that it has compelled me to laboriously write it all out for you in this usually cheerful, often fully coherent space. It goes like this:

I end up in the right lane behind car "A" going, say, 50, in a 55 mph speed limit zone. I move left to pass. So far so good. But as I begin to pass, coming up on the back right of the other car, I soon find I am making no headway despite going 62 or 63 mph. Car A has dramatically speeded up! 

I feel this all is a bit fast. So I slow down a bit, thinking maybe I'll slot back in where I was. However, car A is slowing, and now a new car, known as car "B", going 80 mph, races up behind me. 

I am pinned! 

Feeling it might be rude to slow down even more, I accelerate to pass the original car, car A, on my right. They, as they have been, match me, but at 80 their spirit breaks and I can move right in front of them. The fast car B that was coming up behind me roars by me now travelling at breathtaking speeds. Now in the slower lane I can drop my speed. The driver behind me, car A, pulls out to pass. They race past only to come upon the super fast car B that has become trapped behind two slow cars, cars C and D, going side by side. The car on the right, car D, is going slightly faster than car C though, so as I catch up to this grouping from the right lane, I slowly pass speedster B and the original car A that I passed and that had just passed me as they back up in the left lane. Those two cars, A and B, now fall behind me to pass car C going slowly in the left lane. We all in the right lane, D, followed by me, then B, then A, now all pass the slow car to the left of us, C, and leave it behind. The original slow car A pulls out of the back of our pack into the left lane to race off at 75 mph now. But the car that was going 80, car B, decides to just chill out now safely behind me. Until I decide the car now in front of me, car D, is going too slow and I pull out to pass them, and the cycle renews.

And in conclusion, this is why I think we should all travel only in gondolas.