Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Getting all votey

I voted. I generally take this to be a grim and unpleasant experience in which I am vaguely and hopelessly attempting to stem the tide of something worse happening. I have yet to feel like something good is on the ballot. I vote like I am a passenger in a car being driven by a crazed, drunken, and reckless driver, pressing my right foot desperately into the floorboards of the car, deluding myself that I can will the floor into being a brake.

Contributing to this grim vision is my conception of my vote merely being canceled out by some horrible person of opposite political persuasion. Just one person in the small crowd of my polling place, voting the evil party line, is enough to mute me and empty my vote. Alas, what a bleak thought of my voting insignificance!

But I have a solution!

You all go ahead and vote first.

Go ahead.

Are you all done?


Now cancel out all your contrasting votes. Just put a line through on each side. Yes, sorry, that's the way it goes in a two party Democracy, dissenting opinions and all. 

You all evenly canceled out? Good, good. Clear the ballot then. I'm going last!

I'll be the best President you ever had.


  1. I know about post election disillusionment only too well. Have been shedding silent tears of frustration each time our current leader speaks at us as if we were first graders. Just makes me look forward to the next election all the more - and hope people will finally see things MY way and do the right thing.

    Now please don't take this the wrong way - am just trying to understand.
    The voices we hear from the USA do go on and on about democracy and how amazing they are at it - but the people seem to take part in it so begrudgingly, if at all. What's the deal? I read that only one third voted in this mid term election.

    1. I mostly refrain from large political discussion on my blog because I tend to get sweaty and grow fangs and, ultimately, worst of all, grow tiresome. I don't much like being tiresome, but, like so many people who discuss politics, I only know I'm being tiresome when it's too late!

      All that said, I love answering questions, and much caution goes out the door in the comments section here. Nevertheless, I will try to keep it to the lesser side of pontificating by sticking with the innocence of your quite reasonable questions.

      1. I see nothing offensive in any way in what you ask, so will certainly not take it the wrong way. Your questions, as I said, are quite reasonable.

      2. The voices you hear from the USA about democracy are distractive flack. We have very little democracy here, more like a taste and a hope. The proper word for what we have in the USA is "Marketing". So let me correct that first sentence: The voices you hear from the USA about democracy are Marketing.

      3. Why do people take part so begrudgingly? The accepted answer is they are disillusioned and feel hopeless and that their vote is meaningless. This is a bit of a convenient answer. The main reason is that the Republican Party is understood to widely benefit from low voter turnout and so work hard and tirelessly to depress voting, employing any tool to meet their nefarious ends. The Democratic Party, seen to benefit from larger voter turnouts, are like the Republican's younger brother, and like to wring their hands hopelessly and worry in a not too loud way about the awful things their older brother is doing, but feel that perhaps, somehow, later, they can reason with their sociopathic older brother, and maybe get him to not be quite so bad.

      We'll leave it at that for now. It's bad enough as is. But I am always available here for more questions, especially those in which it is suggested that I pontificate.


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