Monday, May 11, 2015

Messi's second goal

You don't want to hear about soccer. And if you were a person who, in any way, wanted to hear about soccer, you would have already heard about this.

So I won't tell you about soccer. I won't tell you about another pointless game with hundreds of millions of people watching it. I won't tell you about how they took around a billion people and filtered them down according to how cleverly they played soccer until there were just 22 of them left, all of them so good at it that there was something faintly silly about it.

I won't tell you about how, sometimes, one of those 22 could make the other 21 look like the 21 made the billion look.

I won't tell you about the money. I won't tell you about the false importance and misdirected emotions, the lies and the fandom and the winning.

I will tell you instead about little kids on a playground.

They are playing a game.

One of them gets the ball kicked to him after everyone on his team has been passing it around for awhile. He takes the ball, kicking it with little tiny kicks so it's always just right at his feet, towards the goal. A kid on the other team is in front of him, so he pretends he's going in one direction, but he's not! The other kid is so convinced by all this that he actually just falls down. You would think he would fall on his butt, but he is so turned around that he falls on his tummy! So then the goalie kid figures he'd better come out and get that ball. But just as he's about to get it the kid with the ball just sort of lifts it with his toe- pop! And the ball floats real quietly over the goalie kid's head, his swiping arm chases futilely after it, and the ball bounces inside the goal.

The goalie feels bad so he skips into the goal. Ah well.

The scoring team is so happy they hug each other a lot.

I am happy too.

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