I am drunk, as I promised you I would be. I am not terribly drunk. I am mildly drunk. That's as far as I'm willing to go. I am drunk enough to watch the waves of Lake Superior and have them look like they're not moving, rather, I am.
And I am writing, drunk. I am drunk on this drink:
(I warn you ahead of time that this is a complicated recipe)
Cherry Basil Martini
1. In the middle of May plant some basil seeds in healthy soil with full sun exposure.
2. Over the course of 10 or 15 years cultivate a friendly relationship with a co-worker who has a green thumb and grows excellent sour cherries.
3. Acquire a local honey just because, by some fluke, or really, by the ingenuity of my wife, I did, and so now make it a condition of this recipe for both accuracy's sake and for the almost painful air of sophistication it brings.
4. Pit cherries acquired from friendly co-worker and cook them in the honey. They will become surprisingly liquid. Cook them down and drain off the cherry liquor.
5. Pick basil that has grown into bushy plants in the course of two and a half months.
6. Go to a house on Lake Superior designed by a clever architect who learned many important lessons directly from Frank Lloyd Wright.
7. Pour Hendricks Gin into a mason jar.
8. Put a bunch of ice in that jar.
9. Pour some St. Germaine Elderflower Cordial into the jar.
10. Rip up a bunch of your basil and throw it in the jar.
11. Pour in a few thick slugs of that sour cherry syrup.
12. Put some reserved honeyed sour cherries in a glass.
13. Close the lid of your mason jar and shake it until you've really had enough of the shaking and what could possibly be the point anymore. A little foamy is good news.
14. Strain the mason jar contents into your glass as best you can using the lid as a crude strainer.
16. Drink it. It's not actually as good as it sounds. But it's close.
17. No, wait, it is as good as it sounds.
18. Has it all been drunk already?
19. Yes. It is time to write. You are William Faulkner!
20. Did William Faulkner write recipes?
21. Probably, but none of them as good as this one.