To all the funny people

My dear funny people,


This is a message to everyone because everyone, everywhere, sometimes wants to be funny. Even I like to sometimes be funny, like on peoples' birthdays and when there's weather out and stuff. And I have learned a few things, and you would think they would be funny, but they're not. Wouldn't it have been great if they were funny though, and we were having a really good time?

Yes it would. But this isn't that kind of a message.

I am here today to give you valuable information about being funny. This will not help you very much in all your future humorous endeavors, but still, you should know all these things I have learned. 

I warn you, they are a little grim. And then more grim when you think about them.


1. No matter how funny you become, no matter how many people you make laugh, or what a delightful riot you might be, there will still be times when you attempt to say something funny, and it won't be. It really really really won't be.

2. Every bit of humor is like a piece of orchard fruit; it slowly ripens, is perfectly ripe for but a single, delicate moment, and then it quickly begins to rot.

3. People laughing at your joke does not necessarily mean they think it's funny.


Now you know. But from pain, comes comedy.