Monday, August 29, 2016
Tonight I thought of a great new TV show! It's called:
I think it stands for CSN Investigates.
It's a show about a famous folk rock trio who solve cold case crimes for the Laurel Canyon Police Department.
Here is a sample scene:
(CSN, with the assistance of an occult specialist friend (special guest star Joni Mitchell as "The Duchess"), have tracked down a Satanic Ritual site linked to two bizarre, unexplained murders. The scene is eerie, but abandoned).
STILLS: (Continuing from a previous point as they enter) You know we're all thinking she had something to do with this, with her green eyes and golden hair and everything.
NASH: (Ignoring Stills and commenting on the scene) Is that an orange tree? What have they done to it?
CROSBY: It has something to do with those peacocks.
STILLS: Those are peacocks? Shit, it's like they've lost their minds.
NASH: (Pointing) Why are there stars drawn in white chalk all over the walls here?
CROSBY: Those aren't stars, they're pentagrams.
THE DUCHESS: No. Nash is right. These really are just stars. There's nothing particularly satanic about stars. Here. (THE DUCHESS squats on ground and draws a pentagram with a piece of chalk). This is a pentagram. All of these (she gestures) are just stars. It's pentagrams that are part of occult rituals.
STILLS (bursting out): Guinnevere drew pentagrams! (THE DUCHESS shoots him a warning look. Stills continues more respectfully) Like yours, M'lady like yours.
(NASH rolls his eyes).
I could do a whole script if the right people take an interest...