Sunday, May 7, 2017

Library envy and retribution

My library is the undisputed King of our library system. Not only does our traffic dwarf that of any of our other branches, but we are year after year the busiest library in the whole State. This has engendered occasional bad feeling throughout our system. Sometimes the smaller branches feel ignored and passed over. And even though we, the big branch, get dumped on occasionally, we rarely feel it, insulated in our power, grandiosity, and bulging staff, collection, and equipment. Over the years these resentments can build. 

Recently someone, probably in Administration, made an egregious error in our bi-monthly newsletter of events throughout our library system. They listed an extremely popular fix-it clinic as taking place at our library when it is really taking place at another branch. So, in the process of hand correcting someone else's mistake I have gotten a very good look at our next two months of events, lectures, clinics, storytimes, and occasions. At some point I realized that the powers that be are not currently looking favorably upon my own beloved branch. I believe a collective resentment has taken hold politically in the assignment of events throughout our library system.

First let me say that this bi-monthly newsletter is a handsomely glossy 16 page magazine full of all kinds of useful and interesting things happening throughout our library system. Other, far smaller branches, are featuring the above mentioned fix-it clinic where, apparently, heroic repair people fix things that patrons drag in from their homes. Every time something is fixed cheers of adulation and joy ring out through the library. Or so I've heard. I wouldn't know, as it doesn't happen at my library, even though it still says it does on more than half of our events guides. Practically every branch but ours is featuring an Opera Storytime where "a professional opera singer from the Minnesota Opera will combine music and storytelling for a fun interactive storytime experience." One branch is having an after hours teen party, another a "superhero training camp". I wouldn't mind learning how to be a superhero, I mean, depending on the superhero talents. I feel I have a natural talent for time travel, which isn't even really taken as a main superhero talent. I could be "Time Travel Man"! Meanwhile great films of world cinema is screening weekly at a branch not my own, as are a dance party, gardening classes, and a whole DNR hosted morning with frogs! Who doesn't love a frog?

And what do we have in the next two months at my branch, crown jewel of our library system?

Join us on two different Wednesdays for our criminal expungement clinic.


  1. Far be it from me to correct the blog-meister, but your big branch library DID have a fix-it clinic just a week or to ago.

    And there is a brand-new branch that is better-looking than yours, so there!

    1. Ha! Thank you for the comment. I do believe you're right that we had a fix-it clinic- though... that recently? Are you sure it wasn't months ago? But, to be completely ridiculous, I wasn't there for it so it doesn't register. I heard something about it, but it seemed like ancient history so I disregarded it. I apologize for the error.

      I respect your opinion that there is another better looking branch (god knows it doesn't take much), but I have also heard stories about it being A. Dead and B. Horribly designed, and these are A LOT of stories. I myself haven't been there because I don't get out to the provinces very often.

  2. Yes, really, and yes, recently. But I understand about it not being real if you weren't there to see it.

    I haven't heard any interesting stories about my former branch library, but of course the people who work there know about my blog and might be cautious. My opinion may not get much further than the huge improvement on the cubby-hole that served as a children's area in the former building.

    1. I think your perspective is a positive one: how is this library as a public place. I am deeply aware of the dysfunctional managers involved, the problematic architects, and the shoved through site plan that leaves technical services sniping at a fully short shrifted circulation department. To be honest, I think the mad woman who left the circ management and some of the new circ staff is as important in some ways as the new building.


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