Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Bob Dylan Tells You How to Live Your Life

I am so excited to report that I will be the new (co)author of the compilation book:

Bob Dylan Tells You How to Live Your Life

This book takes excerpts from Nobel Prize Laureate Bob Dylan's lyrics, comments, speeches, and writings and assembles them into words of wisdom to guide the young of all ages (the "forever young") on their journey through life.

And, excitingly, in a sneak preview, exclusive to clerkmanifesto, I am here today to present the first ever excerpts from: Bob Dylan Tells You How to Live Your Life!

But first, a note on annotation and structure:

Bob Dylan Tells You How to Live Your Life is made up of the direct quotes, in bold type, of Nobel Prize Laureate Bob Dylan, like so:

The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind.

This is followed in parenthesis by the source, like so:

The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind. (lyric)

The possible sources of attribution include the following:

(lyric), (written work), (speech), (interview), (in conversation), (plagiarized), (high level inner-circle source)

This is all followed by a brief, exactingly clear passage explaining just what, specifically, Mr. Dylan is telling us about how to live our lives. Like so:

The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind. (lyric)

Make sure you're out of the wind when you open your folder of notes on Bob Dylan quotes.


I hope then our format is all clear to you, because now it is time to proceed to our first ever preview of,

Bob Dylan Tells You How to Live Your Life

If I wasn't Bob Dylan I'd probably think Bob Dylan has a lot of answers myself. (interview)

Live life like you would think you had all the answers if you weren't you.

You say I've said things I've never said and then interpret them to mean things they don't even mean. (in conversation)

The more we speak the more we contradict ourselves.

Trust yourself, and look not for answers Where no answers can be found. (lyric)

You might want to consider purchasing a book other than Bob Dylan Tells You How to Live Your Life.

And it's a hard, and it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard. And it's a hard rain's a-gonna fall. (lyrics)

Wear a hat.

I don't want my daughter dating a teacher. (high level inner-circle source)

A wise man should respond to a wise man wisely, but to a foolish man foolishly.

Some men who receive injuries are led to God, others are led to bitterness. (plagiarism)

Even a charmed life has a full share of pain, so it's up to you whether you want to read the 822 page Moby Dick one time, let alone twice! 

Time is an ocean but it ends at the shore. You may not see me tomorrow. (lyric)

Be careful how much you make fun of Bob Dylan because he's getting pretty old and you are gonna be weeping some pretty salty tears when he goes down.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. "I don't want my daughter dating a teacher. (high level inner-circle source)"

    This may require a footnote to your annotation, as a transcript of said quote was recently discovered in the long-lost diary of Betty Borenstein, a waitress at in a Dylan-frequented Malibu hotel courtyard.

    From the diary:

    "Bob Dylan was seated with his wide hat and sunglasses, his legs crossed, always much taller than you would think. He ordered his usual: ginger noodles and red lemonade, no straw. A few minutes later, a couple hand-in-hand arrived. Bob Dylan stood and kissed the young lady on the cheek. I pretended to wipe down adjacent tables so I could hear the conversation:

    "Hey, Baby, good to see you."

    "Good to see you, too, Dad. This is G, my boyfriend."

    Dylan reached his hand out, and G shook it.

    "Nice to meet you, Mr. Dylan."

    "Call me Bobby."

    "Okay, Bobby."

    "No, I'm just messin'. Call me Mr. Dylan."

    "Okay, Mr. Dylan."

    "Ha ha ha, no, man, I'm just messin'."

    "Dad! Knock it off!"

    They sat down. Bob Dylan drank his red lemonade. "I hope you two brought money,” he said, “because I’m broke as a catfish.”


    “Ha ha ha I’m just messin. You kids order what you want. The thing is, I been blessed! I mean a catfish ain’t all that bad, right G?”

    At this point, Bob Dylan’s daughter looked over at G and shrugged. I took their order. Bob Dylan’s daughter ordered ginger noodles and red lemonade, no straw. The young man ordered French fries and a Coke.

    I walked towards the kitchen, but then I heard Bob Dylan.

    “No, man, that’s unacceptable. The only way to go is ginger noodles and red lemonade, no straw.”

    Bob Dylan called me over. “Hey, sweetheart, get him ginger noodles and red lemonade, no straw necessary.”

    “Um,” the young man said, “Mr. Dylan, I don’t like ginger.”

    Bob Dylan’s daughter put her hand in his. “It’s all right, baby, just get the ginger noodles and red lemonade.”

    “And no straw,” Bob Dylan said.

    “But I don’t like ginger,” the young man said. “In fact, I can’t stand it.”

    Bob Dylan spoke. “Nah, man. These noodles, man. You’ll like them.”

    I went to the kitchen with their orders. When I returned to cleaning, Bob Dylan was talking to the young man.

    “So, what is it you do?”

    “I’m a teacher. I teach sixth grade.”

    “Hey, man, that’s uncool. I don’t want my daughter dating a teacher.”


    “Ha ha ha. No, man. I’m just messin’. It’s cool, man. We need teachers to teach, you know what I mean?”

    “Um, yes, I think so.”

    “Where are those dang noodles?” Bob Dylan asked.

    Then Bob Dylan’s daughter sort of clapped and said, “Dad, we have some big news.”

    Bob Dylan tipped his hat and waited.

    “Dad, well, G and I are engaged.”

    Bob Dylan took his hat off and pointed at G.

    “Cool, man. That’s cool. I accept you to marry my daughter. I mean, you're cool, and you’re a teacher, man. Hey, here come the noodles!”

    "I, um, accept you, too, Mr. Dylan, but I don’t want—”

    “Accept the noodles, teacher-man! Just one string. Just slurp it. And wash it with the red lemonade, man.”

    The young man looked at Bob Dylan’s daughter with both hands upturned in desperation.

    "Just eat one noodle,” she said.

    “C’mon, teacher man,” Bob Dylan said. “The clouds don’t argue.”

    “I can’t be—”

    And that’s where the diary entry cuts off.

    Sadly, Betty Borenstein passed away last year. He diary was in fact discovered by her sister. Bob Dylan's daughter and Bob Dylan have declined interview requests.

    1. Everything rings true in this transcript you so kindly provided, except Dylan's use of the word "dang". I am willing to attribute that fault though to Ms. Borenstein's error or reticence around stronger language (r.i.p., bless her soul).

      So...J.mee is Bob Dylan's daughter? Man, you kept that plot twist pretty tight. I suppose it explains how Dylan became interested in this blog.

      But what's even a bigger surprise to me is that you don't like ginger. You know, try some, the clouds don't argue...

      I will of course add all this to the book. Thank you.


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