Wednesday, November 29, 2017
Bullshit sale wednesday!
On Black Friday you saw our biggest discount of the year, 30% off! We only offer a huge discount like that on the most special and outrageous occasions! Black Friday was that unique occasion. But you may foolishly have hesitated or missed it and were full of self-recrimination and bitter regret.
Fortunately, on Small Business Saturday we let you know, through six emails, that we were offering an amazing 30% off! This is the biggest sale that we offer all year, and it was a great opportunity for you to support small businesses like ours.
But you might have been busy, or missed our emails on Small Business Saturday. Thank goodness then for Cyber Monday. We know there was a lot of excitement and anticipation for Cyber Monday and we played it up a lot with our mailings to you, and ads, and emails, especially seeing as we are a "Cyber" venue. So after all of that we didn't want to let you down. And I don't think we did because on Cyber Monday we offered our very biggest sale of the year, a full 30% off!
I'm guessing you grabbed up one of these frankly unbelievable and unique and generous deals. But what if you didn't? Did you miss out? Is it all too late, and is the season of specials over?
Ha! No! Even better, you are being rewarded for your patience and discipline despite temptation because today is:
Bullshit Sale Wednesday!
It is our biggest sale of the year! Thirty percent off!
That's right, you heard me correctly. Thirty percent off of everything! You can't do better than Bullshit Sale Wednesday.
Sales like this don't come around here everyday, that's for sure!
Pinch yourself all you like, it's real.