Friday, October 26, 2018

The flu

I have the flu. And let me tell you it is not pretty. I have been in a near constant abject misery for four days, which feels like a lot more than four days probably because there has been so little sleeping during that time, and so much coughing. Somehow coughing stretches out the fabric of time. So, naturally, at some point I broke. I went to the Internet.

My wife and I looked up "How to get better from the flu fast".

I've made this sort of search before but I was desperate. I was hoping for something like "Firmly grasp the leaf of a houseplant and, speaking out loud and clearly, name eight different kinds of berries. Within minutes you will be feeling vastly better."

But what I got was

"Drink fluids. Loads and loads of fluids."

I am still pretty sick, but I am very, very, very well hydrated. And though I continue to feel miserable, sometimes I am too busy going to the bathroom to notice.

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