Work injury

 

I was heading into one last quiet evening of work before a five day vacation involving Memorial Day and a possibly injudicious use of precious vacation time. Then it happened. From out of nowhere. A paper cut.

"AAAARRRRGHGHGHGGGHHHHHHHH!" 

I screamed. Except I did it in a quiet, dignified way that looked more like this:

"Oh. Shoot."

Then I tried to make it bleed. It almost did. I mean, it was red, and it welled up a little, but not enough to form a drop or blottable amount of blood.

The cut goes right over the top knuckle on the back of my left thumb. I immediately visited every person who was available in the whole library:

A co-worker:

"Oh no! My beautiful vacation will be ruined by my horrible paper cut!" I exclaimed.

My bosses in their office:

"I got a paper cut! We need to fill out an incident report in case I lose my thumb!"

Then I went to the front desk to help people:

"Before I help you," I warned the library patrons. "I have to tell you that I got a paper cut, so my service won't be as good as usual."

They were willing to risk it.

Then it got quiet so I texted Grape:

"This represents the horrible pain of my paper cut" I wrote, and then I included this picture I had taken:

Then, finally, I sat down and wrote all about it in my blog, clerkmanifesto.

That's what you're reading.

And only now, finally, it doesn't hurt anymore.