Trusting in god

When I go on my long morning walk to work I like to be alone. I like the space around me and a quiet lack of distraction so that I can gently commune with nature. When I left this morning I felt pretty sure I would have this world mostly to myself. The paths of my neighborhood and along the river are rarely full of people, especially in the late morning weekdays, but add to that zero degree temperatures, crunching ice underfoot, and a biting wind and one can fairly expect to see almost no one on a four mile walk.

And so it was. I saw a couple dog walkers, cowering in their parkas while I was still in my neighborhood, but along the river there was nobody for miles. I sank deep in my thoughts and observations. I, alone in every direction, turned onto a river bridge only to suddenly find one person, probably the only other person outside in the whole state of Minnesota, five feet in front of me, walking in my direction, at my same pace.

I was not happy. I held my hands out and gesticulated wildly to god. And just as I was about to cry out "Why God why?!" a thought came to me.

What if I tried trusting in the wisdom of God? What if I tried understanding that small trials were messages from God to me to give me wisdom and direction? What if for instance God was suggesting that I needed to be a bit more vigorous in my walking, perhaps for my health, or even just because God knew I was running late?

I decided to walk faster. I passed my fellow walker. My fellow walker seemed to speed up, but, undaunted, I too went faster, speed walking to try and get more space between me and the only other person outside in Minnesota.

"Thank you God." I silently murmured to the heavens as I walked as fast as I could. "You asshole."

"What was that?" God asked.

"I was just thanking you." I said.

"Yes, after that. I thought I heard something."

"I don't think so." I said. "I was probably just breathing really hard. Maybe I grunted."

"Hmm. Okay." God said. "Because I see everything. I hear everything."

"And I appreciate it." I said. "Thank you for watching over me and giveneth of me your wisdom."

"Givineth?"

"You know what I mean."

"I do indeed." God said pompously.

"Wait, what was that?" God inquired, even though he knew all.

"Nothing." I said.

"You're frankly incorrigible." God said. "But, fine." He added. And then he sent me an eagle to look at, which I did, admiringly, while walking as fast as I could.