Pictures against words

I'm not usually at a loss for words here, but I took some pictures today and, it's not that I don't know what to say about them, it's that I don't want to say very much about them.

I like them.

There were about nine or ten in this series that I was excited about, but the effect of photographs on clerkmanifesto always seems to go better if I just put out one of the pictures, if I can.

I can't.

But I think I can keep it to two.

They're flowers.

Just flowers.




Okay, three...

What do I do with Amaro?

Dear Clerkmanifesto:


I recently read your two comprehensive posts about Amaro, the unusual bittersweet herbal Italian Liqueurs. And though your first post turned out to not really be about Amaro at all, and your second post was kind of confusing, I was extremely intrigued by your tasting notes of crushed butterfly wings, barnyard fruits, and fairy pee. So I bought $600 worth of Amaro!

What do I do with it?

I'll take my answer off blog.

Thanks,


Charles Fenimore Alabaster Cohen






Dear Chuck:


Welcome to the wonderful world of Amaro! Now that you have $600 worth of Amaro (I hope it's not all Campari) you wonder what to do with it.

Drink it! Oh boy, drink it up!

Lucky you.

It is all good neat, but I prefer it over ice seeing as some Amaro it pretty thick, plus it's Summer. I currently have a bottle of Amaro Meletti and I mix it with sparkling water over ice. It tastes a lot like what a rum and coke has always dreamed wild impossible dreams of being.

Amaro mixed with equal parts Sweet Vermouth and Gin usually works (and when the Amaro is Campari it is the great classic cocktail The Negroni). You can also try most Amaro mixed with Prosecco and a splash of soda water (a Spritz).

I trust your judgement.

And thanks for writing in. I was keen to answer this question, but I hated to presume.



F. Calypso

for 

Clerkmanifesto

Joe Photographer

Here's Joe photographer heading out on one of his picture taking expeditions. Look at him with his fancy extra close up zoom lens. He's even got a waist kit for his lens attachments and special lights. He is one serious photographer.

Hey Joe photographer, look! It's a super rare cardinal (well, mildly rare)! Quick, get the lens cap off! Turn the camera on! Focus! Where is it, where is it? There it is! Quick now, zoom in, zoom in more! Now...

Drat.

He flew away.

You'll get the next one. 

Maybe just keep the lens cap off for now.

Hey, Joe photographer, look! It's a squirrel! Quick. Zoom back out so you can find him. There he is. Oh, look at him Joe photographer! He's got a nut. The squirrel's got a nut! He is so cute, Joe photographer! Zoom in! Zoom in more! Oh, that's close. That's very close. He's not that cute, he's a rodent, but take a picture any...

Ooops, there he goes.

He's gone.

Wait! No wait! He stopped. The cute squirrel stopped! Quick, find him in the viewfinder and

Nope, he's gone for good now.

Stay strong, Joe photographer.

Joe photographer doesn't cry over the things that might have been.

Hey Joe photographer, what about these nice flowers? These are pretty flowers. And these flowers aren't going anywhere. So take your time. 

Put on the super zoom close-up attachment. 

Hold that camera real steady.

Nope, steadier.

Find your distance. 

Focus. Steady. Steady. Aim. 

Wait, hold it, there's a breeze. 

Quite a wind actually. The flowers sure do bop around! 

Let's let that settle down.

Okay, get ready now, it's calming. 

Aim. 

Focus.

Wait!!! Butterfly! Butterfly two flowers over! 

BUTTERFLYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Get the super close up attachment off. Ohhh, it's a fancy butterfly. Yellow! Blue! Zoom out! Zoom in! Wait, he's on the move. He's on the move! The butterfly is on the move!

Follow him, follow that butterfly. That is a hell of a butterfly! Follow that butterfly. Through the flowers! Into the swamp! Up the tree! Down the tree! Across the street! Into the wading pool. Through the high grasses. Follow that butterfly!

He's landed!

Shoot! Shoot, Joe photographer, shoot!

Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot!

That is a lot of pictures Joe photographer!

Well done!

Let's go home.

Wash your hands.

Take off the Joe photographer waist belt.

Plug the fancy camera into the computer.

Download all six thousand pictures.

Now let's take a look Joe photographer. 

Hmmm.

Huh.

Well.

Kinda blurry.




Here's Joe writer settling down to his computer to write a blog post. Look at him with his fancy computer and his notes.

He is one serious writer.

Look at him go.

What is Amaro?

In yesterday's exhaustive introduction to Amaros, we gave a thorough explanation of these distinctive, mostly Italian, bitter liqueurs.

Wait.

I've just been handed a note.

That's odd.

Apparently we barely discussed Amaros at all yesterday even though the title was "Guide to Amaro".

Hmph.  

I have so many questions!

But I guess I'd better simply move on and let bygones be bygones.

So, what exactly is an Amaro?

Amaro is any of a variety of, usually Italian (some say they have to be Italian), bittersweet liqueurs made from a vast assortment of strange herbs, roots, and chunks of forest detritus, most of which are entirely inedible in any normal context. People like to talk about Amaros as bitter digestifs, whatever that means, but they're actually quite sweet. And the flavor of the various Amari all have one basic thing in common:

They can't really be described very well.  

Cola? Mint? Saffron? Vanilla? Twig? Mushroom? Crushed butterflies? Pine? Autumn leaves? Chamomile? Orange? Licorice? Flowers? Dandelions? Bee wings? Cardamon? Ash? Fairy pee? Tree bark? Snail shell? Old rain? Leather? Barnyard fruits? Coffee? Ear wax? Raccoon? Chocolate? Watermelon seeds? Tangerine pith? Pith helmets? Feathers? Gunpowder? Forest berries? Moss? Cured black tea? Fires? Lavender? Cinnamon?

I don't know how.

But it's pretty fun to try.

Guide to Amaro

You would like to know all about Amaro, the complex Italian herbal liqueurs mostly drunk as apertifs and digestifs. 

You are simply dying to know about them! 

Which begs the question: How did you end up here?



Here are the top ten ways to learn about Amaro, from best to worst:


1. Through your extensive travels in Italy which you spent mostly in strange little bars constantly asking old men for more information while sipping every single Amaro they have until you have a permanent headache, nausea, a passable Italian fluency, and a dangerous obsession.


2. From an extremely well written book by an obsessive fanatic (see above) who is detail oriented and yet somehow also able to win the support of a major publishing company. Note that said author will have learned via the number one process above.


3. From a mysteriously long and interesting magazine article, found in one of our dwindling, high quality magazines, like Smithsonian or something. This is often written as a kind of precursor to method number two above.

 

4. From a book about Amaro written with a serviceable competency and produced by a publisher who thought it might make a few bucks. It ends up only half being about Amaro and has a lot of arty pictures of cocktail bars in Brooklyn.


5. From some guy who takes more of a shine to you than you'd really like at an Amaro bar in Brooklyn..


6. Through a professionally made documentary that somehow mysteriously exists (but probably doesn't) and is all or mostly about Amaro.


7. From the YouTube channel of some secretly wealthy person who spends their life going wherever necessary to taste Amaros (Amari?) in order to make YouTube videos of themselves drinking said Amari. Like method number five this one usually doesn't exist, but it's super entertaining when it does.

 

8. From a generic online magazine or large food or liquor website article written by someone who is a competent researcher and at least mildly interested in the subject.


9. From a popular travel blogger who read the Amaro book listed as number two in your options here and has had a few amari a few times.


10. From the Wikipedia entry.




And so where am I on this list?


I'm not even on it! 

I know, it's so unfair!

Pictures

At the dawning of the Pandemic I whipped out a new blog tool: Photography (yes, I am ever 20 years behind current trends). I thought taking some pictures might suit the more home-based conditions this international crisis would bring about. And though for years I resisted images in clerkmanifesto from the viewpoint of literary purity, The New Yorker never rang me up, and I had to award myself all the Nobel Prizes I have been given.

I have three Nobel Prizes. Two literature and one peace. I'm still waiting for the checks. I think they may have been misrouted to Bob Dylan. 

So anyway, the death of millions seemed like a great temporary opportunity to just let it go and take pictures and put them in my blog.

And if people are just going to keep dying then I am going to keep taking pictures! I was always a little afraid that pictures would cheat on the words, but I have been surprised that they go together pretty comfortably for me.

Consider this a picture taking update, a "where are we now?" with my still nascent picture taking.


Also I thought I'd like to get some pictures I've been fond of (that I haven't found a place for in any posts) up on the blog.







My first pictures here were of graffiti. There won't be any of that today. Partly this is due to my not finding it easy to track down new graffiti where I photograph, and partly it is due to it not being that fun or easy to take pictures of.

But almost simultaneously to the graffiti I began photographing flowers. And that is still mostly what I'm thinking of photographing when I step out my door. Taking pictures of them day after day I keep expecting a little bit that I'll get tired of them, but there always seems to be something new and interesting going on.




Here are some flower pictures I don't think I've shown yet:

Somewhat more recently I've added in what I think of as framing devices to the flower pictures as well. I think of myself as a little on the fence still as regards to this technique, but when I fiddle with them and pull out the very few that work I am happy with them, and so I have more plans in the works:

This one isn't exactly a flower (yet), but perhaps bodes well for the post flower world I'll have to adapt to from the end of October clear into April. In illustrating the way that I categorize my pictures I used a lesser version of this picture last week:

In that context perhaps we're less than a couple months away from more and more pictures like this one up ahead. I like this leaf so much I still carry it around with me! Alas that it's now falling apart though.

The other experiment related to framing is wherein I drop little paintings into the flower beds. Here's a couple of those. The bee visitor on the second one was felicitous:

But I hardly think I'm going for all contrived pictures. And I'll still pretty much drop anything to try and get a picture of any bird, animal, and most insects. I'm always happiest when they're looking at me (and, by extension, you) like in this below:

And there you go. You're all up to date!

Favorite

Among the early expectations in life is that we pick favorites; favorite food, favorite color, favorite number, favorite toy, favorite animal. Just the other day a friend of mine asked me, for the most generous of reasons, what my favorite animal is, and though in all the five decades of intervening years I have well learned to play the game, deep down I am no more equipped to answer such a question than I was when asked at age five what my favorite color is.

I love yellow.

But red is also wonderful.

And purple and green.

And blue. 

Oh my goodness blue.

A couple days ago what was my favorite animal?

I'm wild about opossums lately.

Bees too. Octopus, giraffes, tigers. 

Yeah, I love tigers and I love elephants, and i sort of have a thing for turkeys.

Killer whales and butterflies.

Cats obviously.

Wolves naturally, and foxes too.

Did I mention giraffes? How about owls? Owls and orangutans and raccoons and hawks and boa constrictors, though it might just be that one boa constrictor, David of Oakland.

Oh I can play the game if I have to. My favorite fruit? I am team cherry! But deep down I know that at any excellent blood orange, or raspberry, pineapple or passion fruit, blueberry or apricot, my allegiance is shot. Each thing is inimitable. Excellence is all excellence. Wonder cannot negate other wonders. Favorite is a game.

But oh, hold up Horatio. 

There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy. Or, um, my philosophy. No rule can ever seem to lock the door. And all the tinpot philosophy of the start of this little screed is as nothing to the truth:

For 29 years now I have lived in Minnesota with my very favorite person in the Universe.

No one else ever has, or ever will, come close.

What have I got in my pocketses?

I don't mean to alarm you, but writing a daily blog where deep down I have sworn myself to writing a post every single day without fail (over seven years now) is a great deal like playing the riddle game with Gollum in The Hobbit.

You remember the riddle game? Gollum wants to eat Bilbo. Bilbo would prefer Gollum politely show him the way out of the deep cave he has fallen into. A riddle game is proposed. The first who can't answer a riddle loses and has to comply with the other's wish.

This suggests that my blog posts are something like riddles.

I never thought of it like this before, but... they are! They are almost exactly like riddles!

And if I pose a good riddle I am shown the way out. If I am unable to solve the riddle I am eaten.

So, it's same between the literary scenario and my blog.

Under the extreme stress of the situation, after a couple of pretty nice riddles, Bilbo kind of goes blank. Oh he probably knows tons more riddles, but he simply can't think of them under all of Gollum's pressure and with the worry of being eaten. Yikes.

And so it is that sometimes, writing day after day, it is time for yet another riddle here as well, and I can't think of anything. Bilbo, in his situation, employs a blunt and desperate solution: He asks Gollum to guess what he's got in his pocket.

Me too! When I come to where I have no plan or idea and I really need a post I just go with whatever is immediately, randomly at hand.

Gollum demands three guesses, which, I guess, is fair enough. 

At the time, what both Gollum and Bilbo (and, technically, the reader) don't know is that what is in Bilbo's pocket is the single most powerful magical object in the World!










Same here.

Cat blogging

The other day with my camera I ran into a couple of cats. One played with me and the other posed for photographs. Then the one playing with me posed for some photographs. I will drop everything to photograph a cat. It's probably just as well that we don't have a cat at our house. I would probably never leave. I would just stay home and photograph the cat.

Instead of interesting photographs like this:

Or this:

I would take interesting photographs like this:

Not that there's anything wrong with that. 

I just wouldn't get any exercise.




Out on the photogenic streets of my neighborhood I'll take pictures of any animal that comes along, but they all have their limits. A Robin, for instance, will generally allow me to come to anywhere between 10 and 20 feet of him, depending on the specific Robin in question. The moment I cross their particular line they will hop or fly away from me. Bees are tolerant of my being very close, but eventually get irritated with me- they just have so much to do! Squirrels rarely accept me coming closer than 20 feet, but if we just happen to be within ten or so feet by sheer happenstance they don't care unless I point a camera at them. Monarch Butterflies are all pretty consistent at allowing me to come within nine feet, but not eight. Rabbits have exceptionally specific lines of comfort and might be perfectly comfortable with me 15 feet away, but will instantly run in terror for the deep bushes at 14 feet 6 inches.

Which is why it can be so fun to come upon a cat. I inch my way in to within 15 feet of a cat and suddenly it notices me. It leaps up!

"Oh no!" I think. "There goes the cat!"

And then the cat runs into my arms.