Monday, February 24, 2020

Poll poll

Clerkmanifesto today reported on the results of its comprehensive new poll on its comprehensive new poll. With a sample size of 100,000 subjects this is by far the single most thorough poll ever conducted on itself. Seeking to establish people's feelings about the poll they are taking part in, it has an error rate of just plus/minus one percent due to its impressive sample size. It's key findings include:

22% of respondents were very excited about the poll.

61% of respondents thought it was an incredibly pointless poll but didn't want to make anyone feel bad by hanging up the phone after agreeing to take part in it.

14% of respondents could not for the life of them figure out what the poll was about no matter how many times we explained it to them.

12% of respondents really liked the second question in the poll

42% of respondents wanted to know what the second question in the poll was.

39% of respondents were pretty sure we were "pulling their leg"

And finally:

88% of respondents were okay or very okay with the poll ending


12% of respondents were really quite lonely.

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