Thursday, October 10, 2019

Blood for books

Dear Library Patrons,

As you know, our most popular program is Read It Down wherein one can bring in a child (or yourself, if you happen to be a child), and said child can read at the library to earn credit against library fines. We operate at an exchange rate of one dollar per 15 minutes reading, which is chintzy, but nevertheless can add up if your kid really gets into something juicy. Show 'em the Dahls. This program, as you know, is very popular. And Read It Down skirts child labor laws too, we think, somehow. We're not sure exactly how but are hoping it has something to do with reading being good. Look at you, reading right now! Don't you feel healthy?

But the one complaint patrons like you have with our Read It Down Program is the same complaint pretty much everyone has about everything: 

"What about me?"

Yes indeed, what about your Read It Down?

Well it's coming, albeit with a few changes. For adults only, it just so happens that early this November we are having a blood drive! And while the occasional library patron might donate blood out of the goodness of their heart, we thought to ourselves "What about a little reward?" That is why, this coming blood drive, every pint of donated blood will be worth $5 towards your fines. That's right, $5!

We're calling it:  Bleed It Down.

So come on down in November and absolve your sins (well, library sins) with blood (well, yes, blood).

So looking forward to your visit,

The Library

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